Gaining wisdom and knowledge

I read the best article encouraging parents to mentor their children, to feed them mentally, to be their best teacher. Rising to the challenge of putting my girls ahead of my to-do list and whatever I am trying to achieve, and making them a part of most everything I do during the day, instead of trying to keep them out of my way, has been one of the most rewarding and challenging things I've done as a parent. If this isn't what you are striving towards with your kids (if you have any), then I challenge you to re-think. And I have found so far as I develop better habits, it gets so much easier. Seeing their confidence and hearing the happy words, "I deed (did) it!" and their faces beam with pride makes it all worth it.
Blessings and grace to all you parents! c 

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

To Do: 1) Keep everyone alive 2) Don't loose my temper

The girls watching a real educational movie: Winnie the Pooh.

Some days are hard. Sometimes you just have to sound the retreat, fall back to The Fort, and stop trying to "Take over the World" as Pinky and the Brain would say. Some days are hard, and you have to let go of the extras to make them easier. And there is NO shame in that. Especially if you are doing your best.

And if you embrace it gracefully you can find it's rather nice at The Fort and you might even get a nap *grin*. While in The Fort I find it very helpful to:

• Smile, even if I have to fake it...I soon find my heart following
• Focus on the things I can do, little jobs one at a time
• Sing hymns
• Snuggle up on the couch and read books to my girls, I'm talking for an hour or more at a time. Keeps them learning, us connected, and the house from getting dirtier.
• Stop ANY complaining and focus on things I am thankful for
• Ask for help

 

Yes, dear friend. THIS is my garden. LOL Looks a bit more like confused lawn. The other half of the garden is a bit more mulched and managed, but I couldn't get enough hay to mulch this side in time, so now I just go in with a weed-wacker when I have time and cut all the weeds down. But it's giving us food, and that's what counts, right?

May the Lord bless you all with grace! c

Learning

There is always something to learn when you're two years old. The biggest challenge for me is teaching the girls to work along side me, making pizza, doing the dishes, working in the garden. They eat the pizza dough, dump water everywhere, and stomp on my "baby plants". But. But they learn a lot too, and it really pays off. I've been amazed at how it affects their confidence, how proud they are to feel they are a part of things, AND how they are helpful at time already. But I tell you it takes real love and work and dedication. And sometimes I just have to give in and tell they they are all done helping with pizza and it's time to watch a movie. If this is something you have been working towards and thinking about there is more food for thought here and here.
Fridays are homemade pizza nights at our house. You might want to check out this no-kneed pizza dough recipe. I've been using the same idea with a sourdough starter instead of yeast. I pat out the dough on parchment paper on a cookie sheet, and put baking stones to heat on the grill, load all the ingredients up on the dough (we grate all the cheese once for a couple of  Friday nights, to make it easier) and slip them off the cookie sheet onto the baking stones. It takes between 10 and 15 minutes to bake. Some times it needs to be rotated half way through. I never thought making homemade pizza could make such a fun easy family meal. And it doesn't heat up the kitchen *smile*. But whatever you do this weekend, I hope you enjoy it.
Blessings!c

More Perspective

My brother sent me a nice little note after my Perspective post few weeks back, and this is an except from it.
"I also don’t think you should feel like your sufferings are small.  GOD gives people the GRACE to handle what they are faced with.  It’s not about Richard Wurmbrand or you.  With God’s grace, what he faced may have been far easier than what you face.  You just have to make sure you are bearing the cross God gave you and not some cross you have created for yourself."
I thought it was such a good point that I wanted to share, and make sure I didn't leave an unbalanced perspective. There ARE things that in the long run truly do NOT matter, and many people will look back on their lives and see that they traded their life and time for a dung heap, a pile of crap, or even "good" things that don't matter.

“Friends, why are you doing this? We too are only human, like you. We are bringing you good news, telling you to turn from these worthless things to the living God, who made the heavens and the earth and the sea and everything in them." Acts 14:15

A friend of mine gave me a bunch of very old canned goods, we're talking seven to seventeen years old, so that I could have the jars for my own canning. A huge blessing, but also a lot of work. I spent several morning up and out of the house by sun rise, emptying rotten food into a bucket to be dumped at the back of our land. A heart breaking job in many ways, and in the quiet of the morning I couldn't help but wish that the owners had shared of their vast stores, because I know there were people in their town going hungry, instead of leaving it for someone else to throw away. And I thought that's what God will do with many of our lives when we finally meet him one day. We'll stand before him with the fruit of our labors, things that in themselves are good, but we've let get out of hand and go putrid and rotten, and He'll shake his head in sorrow, knowing that all it's good for is to be taken somewhere to the back of eternity and dumped. It's easy to let even good things get out of their place.

For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. If what has been built survives, the builder will receive a reward. If it is burned up, the builder will suffer loss but yet will be saved—even though only as one escaping through the flames. 1 Corinthians 3:11-15

In contrast we often deem things to be unimportant because they are "little", but the little things can be so critical. The Man fell in love with me and married me in part because I wore a certain shirt on a certain day. God controls and cares about all the little things in our life. In part because "little" depends on your perspective, and we don't have enough perspective to know sometimes what will make a difference. I remember I said something to a brother in the church parking lot, just in passing, about praying to God to find my keys. A long time later he told me what a big impact that comment had on him, something I forgot I said five minutes after it was done.

But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. Matthew 12:36

I guess that kind of strikes at the heart of these issues. My job as a Christian is to be faithful in ALL of life, in every breath, and react and respond to life in a way that lets God shine through me. It's hard. We are potty training, or as I sometimes call it, alternative diapering. They just wet their pants and I clean it up. And when it's the fifth accident for the eleventh day in a row, I don't want to react Godly any more. I want to do like Mrs. Hannigan on Orphan Annie, "Kill, kill, Kill, KILL KILL!" But when it comes right down to it the situation is not a big deal. My response is. And so are the lessons I learn, for as The Man reminded me, how many times has God cleaned up after me? Motherhood is spiritual warfare at it's best as far as I am concerned.

May God bless you with the grace, wisdom, and courage you need for today! c

Perspective

I had trouble sleeping last night. The rooster knocked the hen house door shut in the evening and I didn't get out in time to open it, so they roosted somewhere else, outside. I looked and looked for them with a flashlight, but couldn't find them. The night before I had brought home two new silkies (chickens) and in an effort to slowly integrate them I kept them in a wire dog pen overnight. I got home with them at about nine pm and woke to find the pen drug to the tree line, and both little chickens gone, only feathers, and no sign of forceful entry anywhere. So I was rightfully worried about my chickens and called a friend who brought some live traps down last night. I had trouble sleeping for thinking of them, and for the fact that I kept dreaming that the sugar ants who have invaded my kitchen, and I haven't been able to get rid of, were crawling all over me. I finally woke up this morning because my face was in a wet spot. At first I thought I must have been sleeping with my mouth open and drooled, but my sleepy brain told me that couldn't be right because it was a very large spot and suddenly I was wide awake, because I realized that I had finally found the wet spot that correlated to the wet panties from last night. Yep. Sleep'n in pee-pee. That's me. Mother of twins.

Through a series of circumstances I ended up reading part of a book yesterday that has been on my shelf so long that I don't have any idea when I got it or how long I have owned it. It's called Tortured for Christ: faithful Christians heroically enduring agony, suffering and death in communist prisons by Richard Wurmbrand. This book says that Wurmbrand “spent three years in solitary confinement- seeing no one but his communist tortures. After three years he was transferred to a mass cell for five years, where the torture continued...After eight years he was released and promptly resumed his work with the Underground Church. Two years later, in 1959, he was re-arrested and sentenced to twenty-five years in prison. Mr. Wurmbrand was released in a general amnesty in 1964 and again continued his underground ministry.” 

The following is what I read this morning: “I remember Piotr (Peter). No one knows in what Russian prison he died. He was so young! Perhaps twenty. He had come to Rumania with the Russian army. He was converted in an underground meeting and asked me to baptize him.

After the baptism, I asked him to tell us what verse of the Bible had impressed him most and had influenced him to come to Christ.

He said that he had listened attentively when at one of our secret meeting, I had read Luke 24, the story of Jesus meeting two disciples who went toward Emmaus. When they drew nigh until the village, “He made as though He would have gone further.” Piotr said: “I wonder why Jesus said this. He surely wanted to stay with His disciples. Why then did He say that He wished to go further?” My explanation was that Jesus was polite. He wished to be very sure that He was desired. When He saw that He was welcomed, He gladly entered the house with them. The communists are impolite. They enter by violence into our hearts and minds. They oblige us from morning to late in the night to listen to them. They do it through their schools, radio, newspapers, posters, movie pictures, atheistic meetings and everywhere you turn. You have to listen continuously to their godless propaganda, whether you like it or dislike it. Jesus respects our freedom. He gently knocks at the door. “Jesus had won me by his politeness,” said Piotr. This stark contrast between communism and Christ had convinced him. He was not the only Russian to have been impressed by this feature in Jesus' character. (I, as a pastor, had never thought about it this way.)

After his conversion, Piotr risked his liberty and life again and again to smuggle Christian literature and help for the Underground Church from Rumania to Russia. In the end he was caught. I know that in 1959 he was still in prison. Has he died? Is he already in heaven or is he continuing the good fight on earth? I don't know. Only God knows where he is today.

Like them, many others were not only converted. We should never stop at having won a soul for Christ. By this, you have done only half the work. Every soul won for Christ must be made to be a soul-winner. The Russians were not only converted, but became “missionaries” in the Underground Church. They were reckless and daring for Christ, always saying it was so little they could do for Christ who died for them....

I myself was later in prison together with souls whom God had helped me win for Christ. I was in the same cell with one who had left behind six children and who had was now in prison for his Christian faith. His wife and children were starving. He might never see them again. I asked him, “Have you any resentment again me that I brought you to Christ and because of this you family is in such misery?” He said, “I have no words to express my thankfulness that you have brought me to the wonderful Savior. I would never have it another way.”

Well I have to go, because the rooster is crowing, and I have a possum in a live trap in my yard, right in front of my chicken coop. And I have to make that big batch of sourdough pancakes for breakfast, and get the girls the ready for church, and take a shower, and I sure do hope some hens lived through the night, and not just two roosters and...

And some things in life that feel very important or insurmountable don't matter at all. Isn't a little perspective in our lives a breath of fresh air? Please God help me! Help me be willing to die to myself more each day and be more like you.

The Foundations: Food

I haven't really wanted to talking about my personal food philosophy, but I am starting to realize that so many of the things I would like to tell you about won't make any sense to you unless you understand some of the background thinking and research that I have been doing for the last four or five years. I want you to understand that the changes and understanding came slowly, and the choices we are making now as a family reflect a fairly long process of life change.

Grilled cheese with turkey and apple slices

To start off, if this information is new and shocking for you, then don't make any sudden life changes, especially big ones. Remember to always keep your priorities straight, and don't let food come before God or your family. Ever. Period.

Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, but God will do away with both of them.
1 Corinthians 6:13

So with that disclaimer lets dive right in. I come from a family that is pretty health conscious. My mom mainly cooked from scratch and taught us to do the same, really cooking not just following recipes. We didn't eat a lot of sugar, and I remember often wondering why I couldn't just be like the other kids have fruit roll-ups and gummy snacks in my lunch. I was almost an adult before I ever took any antibiotics, because mom always took care of our colds at home. So I thought I was pretty healthy, as far as lifestyles goes. But I was always sick. Always. Anyone who knows me well can attest to the fact. I got whooping cough at 24. Seriously. This and the fact that I was becoming a wife and mother spurred a deeper interest in researching and understanding the foods I ate. I was surprised to learn when I was already pregnant what a large roll the foods I (and my husband) ate BEFORE I was pregnant would play in the overall development and healthy of my future children. I would HIGHLY recommend the documentary The Ghost in Your Jeans, as a way to help you understand how the choices you make today (not just food, but so many choices) affect not just your children, but directly link to many generations after you. You can watch much of this documentary for free on YouTube, in little ten minute segments. This is a slight rabbit trail, but it is very interesting to watch it in light of verses like: Ex 34:7 and 1Cor 6:16-18. So we all have the opportunity to heal and harm the genetics we have and will pass onto our children. I started to realize how wide ranging the ramifications of my choices could be. In addition to that, as a wife and a mother I am the gate keep of my family's health, a job I take very seriously. Good healthy is a gift that cannot be bought, and is a huge asset if used properly in the kingdom of God. Generally speaking my kids will only eat as good as I allow. My kids can't make their own dinner, and even if they could they wouldn't have the wisdom to make choices that would bless them.

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.
1Corinthians 6:19 & 20

So this obviously brings us to the questions what is healthy food? First eggs would kill you science said, then they are the amazing miracle food. Some people think being a vegan is healthy. Others think eating a high protein (low-carb) diet is healthy. Some think fats are bad, or salt is bad, or...the list could go on and on. There are so many opinions out there, and there is a lot of propaganda, a lot of flaky "science". So how do you know what to believe?
That's a tough questions and one I have asked myself and other quite frequently. The best answer I have found is to hold it up to the light of God's word, which might sound kind of obtuse, when it comes to something like food science, but the Bible has an amazing way of keeping us balanced and helping us to keep our world in perspective. It also talks a lot about food. Second I have learned to question my sources. I learned that food manufacturing is THE largest industry in the US. Stop for just a second and mull that over. The largest in of the wealthiest nations in the world. We are talking about a lot of money.
It's easy for us as modern day Americans to think that science is this unbiased, factual, objective machine, and that my friends is a load of bull crap. Everyone has a history and we all view the "facts" through that history. Science is no exception. You know this if you have looked honestly and openly at the science behind evolution. Science can have an agenda just like everything else, and most of them time that agenda doesn't really care about what is best for you.
"A good example is Harvard University where Dr. Frederick Stare, head of the nutrition department for many years, began his career with several articles delineating nutritional deficiencies caused by white flour and a study on Irish brothers that positively correlated a high intake of vegetable oils-not animal fats-with heart disease. Soon after he became department head, however, the university received several important grants from the food procession industry. Dr. Stare's articles and weekly newspaper columns then began assuring the public that there was nothing wrong with white bread, sugar and high processed foods. He recommended one cup of corn oil per day to prevent heart disease..." Nourishing Traditions.

So there is a LOT of money to be made or lost depending on what you believe and what those beliefs will cause to you to do, because it reaches into money made off of our poor health as well. Understanding that fact will help you to filter in the information you come across. The main aim of the food industry is to make money. Not to keep you healthy, not to say that they are all evil and want to make you sick (though I'm sure that is the aim of some), but that your healthy is not their main goal.

For the love of money is a root of all sorts of evil...
1Timothy 6:10

When I was trying to sort out all of these issues, I kept running across references to the book Nourishing Traditions. I hear about it on People's Pharmacy, from healthy nuts, from bloggers, from religious conservatives. It seemed to be popping up everywhere. So I decided to get a copy. Much of the book is simply a cook book, but it has a lot to say about food science and seems to be a very well researched fairly well balanced book. You can read a shortened version called Healthy 4 Life for free here. Other resources that affected my thinking include the documentaries King Corn, Food Inc., and Super Size Me. I also have found Real Food by Jessie Hawkins to be helpful. All of these resources have their own agendas and biases. It's important in any issue to listen to the arguments at both extremes. 

More more than any of these, it has been simply paying attention to the world around me. It was hearing it a news cast that Toco Bell was being sued because their all beef tacos because they contain more "meat filler" than beef. Or learning from neighbors and friends who raise cattle that they had problems with some sick cow (often times it was cancer) and would take it to be slaughtered. I finally asked (fearfully) if the meat from a sick cow was set aside for non-human consumption. I was told according to the law if the cow could walk it could be eaten (though they did tell me the cancer spots where cut out...not that this helps me much). Yum! It was hearing stories from the chicken processing plants in the town where my parents lived (I talked about some of them at the end of this post). It was reading about the link between a low fat diet and depression. It was hearing from a friend that her daughter had constant yeast infections until they switched to organic milk. If you want to be healthy you have to learn to think for yourself. You have to learn to pay attention to the world around you. Learn to learn. Knowledge is power! You can't blindly trust the world around you with no ramifications. The world does not have your best interest at heart, not in any area.

Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves.

Matthew 10:16

I know, this was a lot of some of you take in. Lord willing next time we visit this topic I'll try share some of the concrete conclusions I have come to about our diet and life style, and what it means for our family, but I know that our diet will continue to change as our understanding changes, and as we learn more.

Feeding Babies

My girls can eat! I jotted down what they ate one day, several months back...I think it was around 12 months...when I was especially astounded at how much they ate. These are approximate amounts by the way. I don't measure their food...as if I have the time!

• 1 sippy cup of milk
• 1 1/2 cups of rice, oatmeal, millet breakfast cereal with Brewer's Yeast and an egg yolk
• 1/2 cup of whole wheat pasta noodles
• 1/2 cup of dry cheerios
• 1/2 cup of spinach and chicken (with lemon and olive oil)
• 1 banana
• 1/2 a whole wheat oatmeal apple pancake
• 1 teething biscuit
• 3 large slices of mozzarella cheese
• 3 crackers with wheat germ

That is not how much both of them ate together, but they BOTH ate that much. I can safely say I have eaten no where that much today, lol. People comment a lot on what good eater the girls are. I say it's just like anything else you have to teach them to eat well. I read somewhere that can take as many at 15 "introductions" to a new food before the pallet can acclimate to it, so that gave me the courage to keep trying. I also remembered reading this quote from Living More with Less (a book well worth buying) "Children don't like vegetables? No, I never heard of that in my country! -Taiwanese nutrition student". I think to great extent children can be taught to be good eaters, it isn't genetic. I don't think little Indian kids eat curry just because they are Indian, but because that's what their parents cook. A friend told me that her child would only eat macaroni and cheese and pizza, all I could think was well I guess he would starve at my house, cause we pretty much never have those foods.Also I've developed two personal policy when it comes to food. One, you don't have to eat it but I'm not giving you anything else. One of the girls decided she didn't like peas, but pureed peas were for dinner and she was hungry. She would cry and cry, and then take a bite and cry again because she didn't like it. So I told her she didn't have to eat it and put her down from the table. And same thing again, cried for food, and when I would give her a bite refuse to eat. She wouldn't stop her hissy fit and wouldn't eat so I put her in her bed and told her she could come out when she would act nice (I know, I know I am SO mean). So she stopped crying and I got her back out, but knew she was till hungry, so I offered her another bite, and low and behold she ate the whole thing and was happy about it. She's never given me a problem about peas since, though I can tell they are not her favorite food. It's hard, but it pays off to stick to your guns. I don't purposefully make things I know the girls don't like to eat. I like for eating to be a pleasant experience for all of us. Two, I will only force one bite. The girls had been eating pureed banana for quite a while, and finally where old enough to eat it whole, but one of the girls decided she didn't like that weird looking stuff. I literally had to squeeze her mouth open and shove a bite it, and she fought me all the way down, and as soon as it was in her mouth went, "OH! That's what that is? Oh, that's yummy!
I wanted to share some of my favorite resources for ideas on feeding babies and toddlers:Baby Bjorn Bibs- The Man says he would have paid three times what these sell for. I used an old fashioned bib one time with the girls, and never did it again. The biggest reason was they couldn't shove these into their mouths. But overall they are are great (as you can see, I used them as feed bags on a particularly stressful day) and you just wipe them down or throw them in the dishwasher. This and the book listed below are now my go-to baby shower gifts.
Super Baby Food- Great resource, I would highly recommend getting your own copy. It has great ideas for foods I wouldn't have thought of, for grinding your own rice cereal in a bender (cheaper and healthier) to laying out what food to introduce when. I disagree with the author's in two areas. She recommends an all vegetarian diet, and all her recommendations are noticeably lacking in fat. We all need good fat's in our diet. Our brain is made of fat, and there is a whole spectrum of vitamins that your body cannot absorb without fat in your diet. Good fats to consider adding (depending on age) are coconut oil, olive oil, cod liver oil, and butter. There are lots of good websites with information similar to this book, but sometimes you really need to have a good book reference.
How to Eat- This is by the British TV cook Nigella Lawson. There is lots of good general cooking advice in this book, but at the back there is a section on "Feeding Babies" and it has a lot of good balanced advice about feeding your kids food that tastes good. It was here that I got the idea to add pesto to some of our bland rice or pasta dishes, and the girls love it and so do I. She gave me the courage to starting feeding the girls food with flavor.
Weelicious- This is a great website with lots of idea. I skim this site whenever planning meals for a little inspiration. There are recipes that cater to kids of all ages. One of our favorites here is the white bean basil hummus. We found it works well in place of mayo (if you happen to be out) in tuna salad too.
Please chime in with any ideas or resources you have found useful...if you happen to be feeding babies. Blessings!c

Happy Late Mother's Day: Beyond This Land of Parting

I sing hymns a lot through the day. I started it when the girls were very little, when I was getting not sleep and mad as a March hare. It gave me a sort of anchor in all the insanity. And still, singing hymns helps me to stay focused on the important things in life and keep perspective, which can be hard to do if you have little ones howling at you all day. I'd highly recommend it as a way of life for any believer. So anyway, I was singing "Beyond This Land of Parting" which is an old hymn you may or may not know (you can listen to it here if you would like to). The girls were particularly fussy that day. They followed me around all day, tripping over each other (still working on walking), trying to get me, and "wailing and weeping". That's the only way I could think of to describe it. So slowly a new verse for this old hymn started to form its self out of my day.

Far beyond the crying, wailing, and weeping
Far beyond the diapers darkening this,
And far beyond the dishes laundry and teething
Lies a summer land of bliss

LOL, cause sometimes you just have to grit you teeth and say, "I'm going to heaven!" And when I'm there I will be glad of all these opportunities for self sacrificing service to others. I hope all you mothers had a wonderful day! LOVEc

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.
Colossians 3:16

Mama-made-easy: Banana Pancakes

A friend of mine wanted my pancake recipe, so instead of taking the time to just e-mail her, I thought I would post it for you all too. These have been a great hit at our house. I love them because the girls can feed themselves, they freeze great, don't take up a lot of room, and are easy to reheat in the toaster. I haven't tried yet, but I'd be willing to bet you could try sweet potato instead of banana (might need to add a little more milk if it's too thick). Nuts or chocolate chips would be a nice addition, and you could smear the pancakes with nut butter and honey for a more protein packed meal. If you're feeding babies these pancakes, don't substitute something else for the butter. Our brains are made out of fat, and growing children need it in their diet. You can read more on the issue here. If you don't have any butter milk, just add a few table spoons of white vinegar to your measuring cup before you add the milk. I recommend you use King Arthur Premium 100% whole wheat flour, or something equally high quality and find ground. The pancakes come out so light and fluffy with this, that you family probably won't even know they are whole wheat (if you have issues with such a thing). This recipe should make around 30 something pancakes, and of course you can cut it in half, but if your a mama and going to all the trouble...just make a big old batch. So without further ado...

4 cups of whole wheat flour
8 tsp of baking powder
4 tablespoons of sugar
1 teaspoon of nutmeg
2 2/3 cup buttermilk
1 cup mashed banana (ripe is better)
4 tablespoons melted butter
4 eggs
Combine the first five ingredients. Stir well, and add the rest. Heat your pan or griddle until a drop of water dances and evaporates when it hits the surface. Drop spoonfuls of batter onto the skillet cook until brown, and then flip and cook on the other side (but you know all that already, right?) and don't forget them while you do something else...like right a blog post. Cause they will burn.
To improve flavor eat them with your pinkies sticking out. LOVEc

Lots of sickness

Someone in our family has had a stomach bug, cold, or flu every week I think since December 18th. I'm tired of it, but I won't bore you with my complaints. We started out with a stomach bug back then, and all of our tummies seem to be a little off track still. I've started using Tummy Tuneup from Beeyoutiful, which is a great supplement resource. I'd recommend requesting one of their catalogues if you have any interest, because their articles are very informative and helpful. I wish we had started using it soon, as I can really tell what a difference it is making.Tummy Tuneup is a pro-biotic, which is like the culture that are in a good yogurt. It's safe even for very small babies, and (I wish I had know this) long term more affective that gas drops on a colicy baby with tummy problems. We have also been steaming under a blanket tent (that's peppermint tea with some lavender oil in the pot). A $16 Vicks humidifier and some essential oils, lavender, eucalyptus, and peppermint oil, has made steaming much easier and more pleasant. All those oils help with a cough from what I can read, and even if they don't, they sure smell nice. I have decided to take a correspondence course called "Family Herbalist". I decided on this particular course because though I have a lot of interest in and need for knowledge in simple family health care, I knew I had a lot of holes in my knowledge. It was particularly interesting to me because the author is a Christian, and I dodn't have to sort through a lot of New Age bull crap to learn about natural remedies and herbs. I've received my books and I'm almost ready to start. It's exciting to learn what a difference such small measure can make. We're not the only ones who are sick right now. Our dear friend Lilly, the seven month old daughter of one of my dearest friends was hospitalised with massive heart failure this past Saturday. We are praying for her all the time. If you need some encouragement in your day pop over to her blog, and make sure to note Lilly's prayer requests for the day. Don't to miss the amazing story from Saturday and the way God used them to touch one of the doctors. BLESSINGSc

Consider cloth diapers

I can remember when I first heard about cloth diapers. I was honestly unaware of anyone using cloth diapers in this day and time-in the US at least. Seriously, who would want to wash poop when you can just throw it away? Years later I had a friend who used cloth diapers and when I saw how many benefits there where I knew it was something I wanted to do too. And the funny part is that I actually love it. Weird I know. But I'm not the only one. Another mother told me, "I'm looking forward to having another baby so I can use start cloth diapering again." Sounds crazy, but I thought I would tell you about here just in case you had never heard of it either.
So. Here are the benefits of cloth diapering as I see them. The cost of disposables and wipes for twins till 2 1/2 years old I calculated at $3,400 and cost of cloth diapers for twins $400. Wow! This is the biggest selling point for me. It really gives me the feeling of doing my part to be a good manager and steward of The Man's money, which I believe is part of my job as a wife. Now I must mention that we do cloth diapers in the most simple way possible, but like most anything in life you can spend as much money as you want on cloth diapers. I figure a low average cost of disposables for a week for twins is $20. If the girls were perfectly potty trained by 2 1/2 (that's not my goal, just trying to drawl a line for comparison) the cost of disposable diapers would be $2,600. I don't know how to calculate the cost of wipes because I only use disposable wipes sometimes when we are out. It seems like a decent guess would be $800. Below is a cost break down for cloth diapering. The only cost that would increase if we used diapers longer would be the laundry detergent. Many of these items I found used, on sale, or were given to us but I'm counting the average list cost. You can click on the links to see items that I like and where i have bought things at. Remember these are costs for twins.
2 newborn size non adjustable diaper covers $15
4 small diaper covers $48
6 large diaper covers $102
24 flat diapers $24 (this was the cost when I bought them, evidently it's going up at this site)
4 snappis (modern diaper pins) $12
4 pocket diapers (for night time) $60
3 bottles of Charlie's Laundry Soap $75
1 Wet bag (this is to put wet diapers in when your out, you can just use a grocery bag or a zip lock, but I really like the wet bag) $16
Cloth wipes $.40 (I just cut 8"x8" squares out of four old receiving blanks bought at a yard sale for 10 cents each and did a zig-zag sew machine stitch around the edge
Wipes solution $12 (I use a little of this soap mixed with a generous amount of water and a drop or two of lavender oil. It looks like one bottle of each will last me for diapering both girls).
So the grand total is $364 and I would round it up to $400 for shipping. It is worth noting that I bought most things on this list below the prices I listed here. In addition to these cost savings most of the stuff I have bought I am keeping in good enough shape to use again for the next baby.
A lot of people worry about doing laundry all the time. I have to wash baby clothes pretty often anyway, and after the diapers are rinsed I throw everything in the washer together, so I don't end up doing much more laundry that I would otherwise. In addition most days I hang out the diapers to dry, as it helps them last longer. Hanging laundry as a new mom has helped keep me sane. It's a nice little QUIET time to myself with some sunshine and fresh air. I really love it.
Cloth diapers breath well and aren't full of chemicals. We use disposable diapers when we travel or are very busy, and the diaper rash problems we have had came from disposables.
Wow...this post has taken me days to write...little snippets at a time. I'll try to return to this issue in the future and give some more how to and technical information on cloth diapering. Until next time~
Blessings!c

Learning to be a good mother

A friend left a comment on my blog a while back saying that it seems I've fallen quite naturally into the my new roll as mother. All I could think while reading it was that I must not be leaving a very balanced impression here. I was recently given a book on twins. As I read the following lines from it all I could think was how very accurately they describe the first month or two for me.

"People who have not brought up twins probably underestimate the importance of having enough sleep at night in order to cope with their babies needs during the day. As a mother of twins you have unprecedented demands made of you at a time when your physical resources may be seriously depleted by a tiring pregnancy, followed perhaps by a difficult birth...In these circumstances you may feel inadequate and depressed, especially if this is your first experience of being a mother. The demands made on you are heavy-but none the less you do meet them. If you meet them a way that feel less than ideal, it is not the you are inadequate, but that you are in a most difficult situation...When your experiences do not match up with your expectation, you may feel cheated, without realizing that the fault does not lie with you. Often there seems to be little you can do except sit it out as calmly as possible, and take a break, however briefly, whenever you can. However welcome and loved your twins are, there may be times when you feel you can't cope with the relentlessness of their demands." Twins: from conception to five years

My dad just told me today that a few years back the Marines did some studies to find out the quickest way to turn a man into a killer (gruesome thought) and their answer was sleep deprivation. I believe it! My but there were some dark days those first few months, and how I have envied moms who do seem to fall so naturally into motherhood, but then maybe they have had just as tough a time as me and I just can't see it. But in those difficult days I learned many important lessons.My need for God. There were some nights that I literally thought we would never make it, that three o'clock would never give way to four o'clock, that the sun would never rise on the earth ever again, and I would forever be stuck in those moments with little red faced babied who screwed their eyes shut and screamed so loud my ears rang. It sounds very silly in the calm light of the next morning, but that's just how if felt in those moments. Looking back on those dark nights I realize that my very worst moments were when I was so deep in the "depths of despair" (to quote Anne) that I forgot to look to God. I forgot that to ask Him for help. I forgot that my God would hear me and part the heavens, fly on the wings of the wind, expose the foundations of the earth to snatch me, little crushed me, up out of deep waters (Psalm 18). God has given The Man and I the awesome responsibility of raising, loving and training up these children of His, and He will help me every step of the way, if I will only look to Him. I try to remember to take everything to Him, especially when I can't figure out what is wrong with one of the girls or what I should do. God always knows, and He's always willing to help, though the answers are not always what I expect. No matter how demanding life is I need to clear a little space to maintain my relationship with God. I've learned to read my Bible while nursing and pray while doing most anything, and even leave little screaming people in their beds when nothing seems to be working and get a breath of fresh air or a glass of water and pray for the strength to keep trying.
Balance. I used to think that motherhood was all self sacrifice, like the story I heard of the mama bird who stayed on her nest in a forest fire when she could have flown to safety, and under her scorched lifeless wings where found her safe little ones. She died protecting them. I still do believe that motherhood is about radical, exhausting, daily self sacrifice, but that's not all it's about. I know of a mom who never stopped to go to the bathroom when her children were young and needed her so much, and she ended up really hurting her body. Somewhere there is a balance between being a good self sacrificing mother and taking care of yourself so that you have a self to sacrifice. Yeah, I know. It's a catch 22. Two key traits of a good leader are being ready to sacrifice everything for the cause, and staying mentally and or physically ahead of those being led, so as to be worthy of leadership. What a difficult balance! I may never learn how to walk that line the way I should, but I still have a responsibility to try.
Grace. I do most things all the way and when I fail, I fail BIG. It's bad enough to fail yourself, your God, and your husband, but it seems extra heartbreaking when I fail my girls. They look to me for everything, and that is such a big calling. Little as they are and though I know they don't understand I always ask the girls for forgiveness whenever I have fallen short of my calling. Then like Jacob wrestling the angel for a blessing, when the storm is past I try to find a quiet moment and look back on the situation and learn something from it, force my mistakes to become blessing for the future. (I read a wonderful post on this very topic recently). And after that the best thing I can do is move on, determined to do better in the future. I can already see that as a mother I will need to show myself grace often.
Blessings!c

Breastfeeding

Despite the 14+ feedings I do a day for about three months now, I'm no expert on breastfeeding. We had a lot of problems to overcome at the beginning. It takes a little while to learn the techniques to good breastfeeding (well it took me a while anyway) and it can take babies a little while to learn how to feed well. I had to be away from my girls and in the hospital not long after the birth, and pumped during that time, and I was on medication so the girls had to go on formula for a while, and I lost a lot of my milk supply, which had to be built back up. But we have worked through all of it, and the girls are growing SO good. You absolutely should get more comprehensive advice if you plan on breastfeeding, but here are somethings that I didn't find in the books.

• Breastfeeding is not intuitive, or at least doing well without pain and bleeding isn't instinctive anyway. It's something you need help with to be successful at. I had more that one experienced mom help me with my latching and problems I had at different times in the learning process. Seek out women who really enjoyed breastfeeding among your acquaintances, go to LaLeche League meetings, or hire a lactation consultant. What I'm saying is don't be afraid to look for help. I would have never made it without some!
• If breastfeeding is painful for you in the beginning use the breathing and relaxation techniques you (hopefully) used in birth.
• It kind of like learning to drive a car, a lot of motor memory skills. And just like you weren't ready for Nascar after your first driving lesson, its going to take you a little while to get the hang of it. Give yourself some grace, and remember all the reasons it's worth it...you know the reasons, you've read them. But I must say now that I've got the hang of it...well breastfeeding is just one of the sweetest things. It had the power to create such a lovely, comforting, soothing bond between you and your baby. The first time your baby looks in your eyes and she rubs her little hand up and down your side while feeding and then relaxes and falls asleep in your arms you'll know it was all worth it.
• Keep your fingernails cut short as you come closer to your due date. I think this helps with just handling new babies in general, but it especially helps when you have to unlatch your baby.
• Get some lanolin for breast feeding (Lansinoh is a brand that is available at most drug stores) and use it after each feeding. When I was having pain during feedings I was encouraged to express out a little breast milk and then stand in front of a fan and let it dry before I put on any lanolin. Air drying can be very helpful. Getting some direct sunlight on your breasts each day is supposed to be helpful also is healing up an cracking and bleeding. Try heat or cold to sooth pain.
• If you are having a lot of trouble with cracking or bleeding and are considering quiting because of it try pumping for a while instead of feeding, so that you can heal up. Pumping helped me get an idea for how breastfeeding should feel if I'm doing it right, which helped me know when I was doing it wrong and it gave me time to heal. I am told that breast pumps can be rented from a pharmacy, but I have never tried renting one.
• Check your breasts regularly for knots or painful spots. Massage them as you feed to get them worked out. You need to take care of these as a clogged milk duct can grow into worse problems. If you have some knots that won't move try to get extra rest and fill a bowl with water as hot and lean over the counter and soak your breast i the bowl for ten minutes massaging it occasionally, then breastfeed as soon as you can afterwards. That was the tip that worked the best for me.
  
• There are lots of ways to increase your milk supply. Mother's milk tea worked pretty well for me, but there are LOTS of ways to increase your supply. If you suspect that your baby is not getting enough food be carefully about running right to formula, as that could cause you to have even less milk. Your body increases the supply to meet the demand, so make sure she spends lots of time sucking even if you need to give her something afterwards. Make sure to drink plenty of water.
  
• Keep some reference materials around on breastfeeding. Having a copy of "The Womanly Art of Breasting" around has helped me lots when I ran into an issue that I wasn't sure how to deal with. I found this article on latching really helpful. I wish i had read it before I started breastfeeding.
  
• Breasting feeding can be a wonderful opportunity to do your Bible reading and listen to some great pod casts. An ipod has turned into one my small blessings in mother hood. I have listened to several books on librivox (I highly recommend this one, and this one, and this one...too much fun and very encouraging too) and of course this is the perfect time for the Homemakers By Choice podcast (it was such a blessing and encouragement for those weeks that we couldn't make it to church). If you need a little inspiration for all the cooking your not doing, ideas for quick dinners, and just plain old entertainment (even The Man, who's interest in cooking equals zero finds these podcasts interesting when he hears one) you must check out The Splendid Table, and if you start feeling horribly disconnect from the rest of the world (I couldn't believe it, there were major earthquakes that I didn't even know about until weeks afterwards, lol) you might try this podcast for a five minute update on the news of the day.
• After I became comfortable with breastfeeding I was able to use a ring sling (there are some lovely ones at this site, though I didn't get my ring sling here, I did get a wrap carrier and the shop owner was MORE than helpful) to breast feed and do things like type up an e-mail, make lasagna, or soothe a SCREAMING baby in while shopping (covered of course). That discovery has been a real blessing.
  
• I had a lot of trouble keeping the girl's hands out of the way while trying to get them latched. Swaddling while feeding can help you get through that stage if you have problems.
  
• Lastly, breastfeeding is not just about food, but also about relationship. My two girls are different people and they interact with me and feed differently. Get to know YOUR baby. Learn to understand her and speak her language. I heard a story the other day of a lady who could eat anything while breastfeeding but deviled eggs, lol. It upset her babies stomach. Sounds crazy, but she figured it out. The best thing you can do as mother in most any area is know your child.

Mum's Day

This will be my first mother's day. How my life has changed in the past few months. Sometimes I just look them in the eye and I can't believe I actually have babies...much less twins. It's amazing to watch them grow. They are SUCH different little people.In celebration of mother's day I have a few little gifts for you. The first is a mother's prayer calendar. What a blessed idea! I'm framing my copy to hang on the wall. It gives you a reminder to pray for something each day of the week. I've been praying these things not just for my children, but also for The Man and I, and that we will have the wisdom to train and instruct our children in these areas. The second is this amazing and simple chocolate creme brulee recipe. Really now, need I say more? We are getting milk from a local family so we had lots of extra cream and I added whole milk to that instead of the half and half...and we had fresh eggs from our neighbor Farmer Mike who seems to have some very busy happy healthy hens. They have the yellowest yokes I've ever seen. This stuff is gooie chocolate glory. I just ate some :) And to top it off it is such a nice easy recipe, but HOW impressive! This is definitely going into the impress a guest, love a husband, cheer up a moma cooking list. Oh and by the way, if you don't have any little ramekins to bake it in just use coffee mugs. You might think about toping it with some fresh strawberries. I was going to do that, but I got so excited I eat the whole thing before i thought of it, lol. (And of course you don't want to waste those egg whites, so then you need make some of these) May God bless all you mamas out there and all of you who are waiting and preparing to be a mama one day! c

Joy in the Morning

Pretty much nothing about our birth story is typical...but then it must be that every birth is as unique as the people involved. We decided, after much prayer and thought, to fly in a more experienced midwife to join our birth team. God worked everything out as she was available and willing to come during our due date, and we were so blessed to have her. I had to work hard the last few weeks to avoid anything that might make me go into labor, especially my walking and yoga. I wish I could have done both of those things till the end, as I lost a lot of muscle and energy and felt far more uncomfortable when I couldn't exercise, but you do what you have to. After all the pieces were in place and we were sure everyone was ready, they induced me. I was fully dilated after about...man it runs all together...a few hours I guess of focused relaxing and breathing (our mothers outside the birthing room wanted to know if anything was wrong because I wasn't screaming :) fully dilated that is except for the cervical lip, which took forever to go away. I had to labor on my back and couldn't move around much at all so the midwives could control what position the girls were in. There were many positions I was interested in trying to labor in and on my back was NOT one of them. But it was for good reason. Every time they would check me there was a different baby and a different presenting part, lol. I like to tell people we had a Jacob and Esau birth. I labored in candle light with classical music playing and slept between contractions all through the night. I had back labor, and "front" labor too, lol. I kept my red and white striped socks on through the whole thing, a semblance of modesty I guess. It's hard to say when labor started exactly but we had around 12 hours of it. Penelope was born feet first and Celia came an hour later with a bigger head and her hand next to her face. There isn't any way I can really describe it all. It was powerful, painful, an amazing gift.

For me our birth is something rather sacred, it was about God working through The Man and I to bring people into the world who simply "weren't" before and now they are here. God created people through us, through love; how powerful is that?! It thrills my heart to think of it even now. The girl's birth was about learning just how great and faithful my God is, and how with Him I can do SO much more than I ever thought possible, that even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I fear nothing because God is with me...and I repeated those words over and over to myself through that dark night.

The midwife told me in one of my dark moments, don't worry, the joy comes in the morning (Ps 30:5). And she was right. As the sun began to rise the four of us lay in bed together and all the hardships of the night melted away. I knew that this was the best way I could start motherhood, with the knowledge that I can do hardest things to protect and provide for my children, the knowledge that when my strength gives out God will pick me up and carry me to the finish line, and that no mater how dark the night gets, as children of God, we have the firm promise that joy WILL come in the morning. It's funny, even being a child of God has a different meaning for me now.

Here are some of the things I learned in our birth process, little and big.

• Just because your baby is breech doesn't mean you need a c-section, though it might. There are other options out there, like in my case flying in someone who is knowledgeable and experienced in breech and twins births. Be your own health advocate and don't ignore your instincts. Do your own research. But most of all, seek God's face. C-section was not the best option for us. I believed it before the birth and I believe it now.
  
• People always say how ugly you will be to your husband during birth, and I always hated the idea. I secretly (literally, I told no one) vowed I would prove them all wrong, and that I would not let pain make me turn on my best friend and the person I loved best in the world. I did prove them wrong. I never yelled at The Man even once in the 12 hours of labor. As hard as it is you can decide not to be hateful during birth...it's a waste of precious energy anyway.
• Birth can make me an irrational coward. It my darkest moments I wanted what I fought so hard against: a c-section! Make sure you really trust your birth team and they have a clear understanding of your priorities and goals in a birth. I needed to be surrounded by people who really believed I could do this and would help me believe it too when I got lost in the pain.
• The Man is no coward. 12 hours of labor. 12 of them. And he left my side only twice.
  
• Hiding scripture in your heart is an unmeasurable blessing in life.
• Drugs to dull the pain would really do me no good. It was hard enough to figure out how to push (since I never had the urge to push) it would have been impossible for me if those muscles were numb.
  
• I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me, literally.
• Good health through diet and exercise can make all the difference both for moms and babies.
• The little details can really matter to me. Lip balm, drinking straws, and having my hair out of my face in a pony tail were all really important that night.
  
• Saying WOW during contractions helps open the cervix. "Wwwwwooooooowwww" Don't be afraid to try things that you think other people might think are stupid if it helps you
  
• Environment is VERY important to me: low light, music, no people i don't know coming in and out, and no tubes in my arm.
  
• It won't last forever, even when your sure your are going to be in labor for the rest of your life, it won't last forever.
• Natural birth makes for very healthy babies. Even with 12 hours of labor the girls came in the world bright eyed and lovely. The midwife said Penn smiled at her as she was coming out.
• I can do what I must as a mom for the health and protection of my children without complaining.
• Jello jigglers made with Knox jello, real fruit juice, and honey are my perfect labor food...and anyone who thinks you can go through 12 hours of labor without some food to give you energy is crazy in my book.

A day later The Man read to me as I lay in bed recovering and he came to this psalm, Ps 20, a psalm I had given to and prayed for so many friends in hard times. The Man and I wept together as we realized God had done just this for us:

May the LORD answer you in the day of trouble!
May the name of the God of Jacob protect you!
May he send you help from the sanctuary
and give you support from Zion!
May he remember all your offerings
and regard with favor your burnt sacrifices
Selah

May he grant you your heart’s desire
and fulfill all your plans!

May we shout for joy over your salvation,
and in the name of our God set up our banners!
May the LORD fulfill all your petitions!

Now I know that the LORD saves his anointed;
he will answer him from his holy heaven
with the saving might of his right hand.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
They collapse and fall,
but we rise and stand upright.

O LORD, save the king!
May he answer us when we call

Patterns of waiting and longing

I remember when my sister was born; sadly not because I was so overjoyed to have a little sister (sorry hun) but because I got a baby doll. It looked like a real baby, and was just the right size to wear little baby clothes. I took that baby everywhere, and when Moma would show people my little sister, there I was with my baby in a blanket to be shown too. People would ouu and ahh over my baby and it wasn’t till much much later in my life that I realized they knew it was wasn’t a real baby. But it didn’t matter. I was hooked. I knew what I wanted to be, a moma, just like my Moma, well almost just like, I also wanted to be a ballerina teacher (notice, not a ballet teacher). Things came and went in my life, but that was one thing that stayed the same. I was at a loss after college; I didn’t know what to do with myself. The only thing I really wanted on earth was to be a wife and a mother, and I couldn’t have that. So God’s plans took over, and it wasn’t easy, and I was single for a while, over 27 years. But now finally I find myself married, and not just married, but I’m married to The Man. I mean he even has a white truck, which we drove away from the church in after the wedding; that’s almost as good as a white horse…maybe better. I fall more in love with him all the time. He’s everything I waited for and more. Yet even with this, I live with the same patterns of waiting and longing that I did before. I used to think marriage was like a best friend + sex, but for us at least it’s so much more than that, a completely different bond. When he’s gone the emptiness is far deeper than I ever experienced when I was single. I miss him so much even the memory of his annoying idiosyncrasies is nostalgic, lol. What I’m trying to drive at is this: things are not going to be “right” down here. I believe the only place where all our longings and desires will be fulfilled is heaven. So learn to live with your longings in joy; learn to long for heaven. Stop thinking that, as soon as I graduate, as soon as I have kids, as soon as I can travel, as soon as I…bla-bla-bla. Stop thinking that you are going to reach a point on this earth where all your longing are fulfilled and you can finally be perfectly happy. Learn instead to be perfectly content…let God help you learn this. Shew! What a struggle this is for me these days!

Learning- slowly

These first few months of marriage have been, well... beautiful, something rare and precious, a true gift from God. But I would be lying to say they have been all marital bliss. You know how people say having children is like a mirror which reflects the best and worst of you? Well that's what marriage has been for me. Sometimes its horrifically shocking to really really see yourself, in that recent photo or the three way mirror in the poorly lit dressing room, for instance, and think "Oh NO! Is THAT how I really look?" Really seeing some of my sins, things I was honestly unaware of before, truly devastated me, even to the point of despair at ever improving. Thankfully at the brink of this despair I was reminded of how strong and faithful God is and to believe in his power to truly transform hearts and lives, even mine.

I'm beginning to think that life is often learned in cycles. I wanted a family from the time I was four, when my sister was born, I felt it was my calling. When I found myself unable to fulfill that goal I was lost and confused. I learned a lot from being single, things I may not have learned any other way. I'm fulling convinced God took me down that path because it was best for me eternally. Towards the end of my single time I started to get comfortable with my situation and my spiritual life. Marriage has changed my perspective, shattered that little glass house, and helped me to see myself better. I tremble to think what having children will reveal about my true character!

I've been reading Moses' story today, and I think I must have experienced something similar to his life. Raised in a family of great faith (his biological family) believing he was positioned to work for God (Acts 7:25) he took action, only to find that he needed a (long) period of humility and service to be prepared for that calling. Yet when God deems him ready for that work Moses would rather argue with his miraculous burning bush than go! Maybe Moses also got too comfortable and self satisfied in his period of training.

"Every assignment is measured and controlled for my eternal good." ~Elizabeth Elliot

"The LORD spoke to Manasseh and his people, but they paid no attention. So the LORD brought against them the army commanders of the king of Assyria, who took Manasseh prisoner, put a hook in his nose, bound him with bronze shackles and took him to Babylon. In his distress he sought the favor of the LORD his God and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers. And when he prayed to him, the LORD was moved by his entreaty and listened to his plea; so he brought him back to Jerusalem and to his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD is God"